Welcome to my blog: I am surprised that I finally made it to the blogosphere. Maybe it is just me but sometimes I feel like the world is out to get me. I am sure everyone feels this way at times, but today just happened to be one of those days. Whether these days start with a fight between your family, your friends, your coworkers or you boss it doesn’t matter because the rest of your day is ruined. It could be snowing, hailing, raining, windy as all hell, or just flat out cloudy out and those will not ruin my day; it is ruined when I fight with someone that I care about me. Sure I love my family and friends more than my boss but I, at the very least, want her to be happy. But when someone you feel this way about basically makes you feel pointless or like you have no meaning on this planet, it is the worst pain ever. After this occurs, anything that goes wrong the whole day just multiplies how bad your day will be.
Eventually, I get to a point where I start to think, how could all this happen on one day? Is it coincidence? No, coincidences don’t happen. In my opinion, everything that happens was meant to happen and there is nothing you could do about it. It is almost as if life were scripted. To this, I ask you, could it be? Maybe I am just like Truman Burbank for the movie the Truman Show. What if my life is scripted? What if everyone reading this article is being paid to read it? Where are all the cameras? Am I allowed to leave if I want? That would be one sick, twisted world if I really am in a television show without my knowledge. Just think about it… We all have had the feeling that we were being watched even when no one else is near us. Even when I sit at work in my office alone and my door is shut, I feel like someone is watching me. Is it not weird to think that everyone out there is a character in the show of your life? Yeah it is crazy to think about, in my opinion, but sometimes it has to slip into your mind. Maybe it slips in because we know we cannot control anything that happens to us so we just want to say that someone like God or a director has scripted our lives. If we think this way then we cannot be upset with what is happening because we couldn’t control it if we wanted to.
So yeah, sometimes I seem crazy because I feel like I am at the center of the universe and that everyone in my life is just an actor playing their roles that were assigned to them. But when I wonder why I have a crazy day, it all makes sense to me. The script today was just to put me through tough situations. I couldn’t do anything to change it.
There have been times I sit and wonder why am I single? Why do I do some of the things I do? Why are other people so rude at times? Why don’t some people I love want anything to do with me? I mean I feel like I am a great person who has some great qualities. I am not the hottest male on the planet, but I definitely am not hideous. The simple answer to all of these is because that’s how you were raised in this mock world and that others are just being paid to be the way they are. I know that at the end of the show or life, there is going to be a moment where all these questions will be answered either by a God or by the director. Thinking this way just puts me in a better mood and I really don’t care if people don’t like it or that they think I am crazy.
Life is too short to sit around and try to control everything. I need to try to live in the moment rather than planning out every aspect of my life. Because clearly I have learned that there is no control. I cannot simply have something that I want by working for it. It is either meant for me or it is not. I am too scared to approach a girl at the bar and say anything. I am too scared to tell someone that they are bothering me and need to get the hell away from me. I am too scared to tell the girls I have a crush on that I have a crush on them. I have tried to do this but every time I approach, I start to worry about the outcomes. What if this girl gives me her number? Where do I go from there? What if she says she has a boyfriend? What if some dude punches me for talking to “his” woman (Side note: I hate when men or women claim to have possession of someone else). If I just think that things are scripted then it doesn’t matter because what is going to happen is going to happen and there is nothing I can do about it.
I try to be old fashioned about things in life because I don’t believe that manners and chivalry are dead. I believe that those should be done and as a matter of fact honored by society. But when you see some great girls with the biggest douche bags in the world you have to wonder if chivalry is dying. But this is for another blog post. The current topic is about taking chances because no matter what, we can never control the future. So we shouldn’t be upset for a long time if we get cheated on, yelled at by our bosses, disappoint our parents, or got into a fight with our friends. I have had all of these happen to me so when I say it makes us stronger, it really does. Living a mindset like this will only make you feel more complete when it comes to laying on your death bed, which will be sooner than most of us think. You will be there, looking back on the rest of your life saying, “am I happy with the decisions I made in my life and do I regret doing anything?” Of course the answers will be that yes you made some bad decisions and that you do regret a few things that happened but the key is that you didn’t dwell on the downs but enjoyed every last second of the happy moments.